The resolutions of a half-hearted yo-yo dieter.

As you may have noticed, it is the New Year – the time to make resolutions we may or may not keep.  As is tradition, among the newcomers in my resolution list, you will find the hardy perennial: the same resolution I have made every year since records began and which I have clearly failed to keep or else I would no longer need to make it!

As you may already have guessed from the title of this post, my resolution is ‘to lose weight’. This year I am aiming for 2 stone to put me well into ideal weight range and stop those blasted weighing machines from telling me (and anyone who happens to be stood nearby) that my BMI makes me categorically ‘overweight’.

My ‘yo-yo weight’ has not really been that yo-yo to be honest. Apart from a notable increase when pregnant with child number 1 (no, I didn’t listen to the ‘you only need the equivalent of an extra piece of toast in order to eat for two’ advice, far preferring the mythical alternative ‘eating for two means you can stuff yourself as much as you like and it will all fall off when the baby arrives’. I did the former and the latter turned out to be the myth you sensible people knew it was!), my yo-yo-ing has been rather sloth-like as I have lazily wandered up and down between being a stone and 2 stone over the weight I would like to be.

Periodically, I try a new diet and/or exercise regime (one notable attempt involved the appropriately named ’30 day shred’ which had me collapsed in exhaustion after a mere 4 minutes), but after an enthusiastic start, I always flag quickly, my resolutions scuppered by the simple fact that I desire stodgy, fatty, tasty foods probably more than I desire being a bit thinner.

But this time (honestly) I will succeed! On New Year’s Eve I joined Weightwatchers online whilst my husband drove us to a friend’s party where I had every intention of consuming copious amounts of cheese; crisps; chocolate and champagne (and I did just that!). This may seem as if I was setting myself up for immediate failure, but I was planning ahead – prepping for the new me whilst simultaneously living out the old one (I might use the analogy of a snake shedding its skin whilst growing a new one underneath, but to be honest that image seems rather unpleasant when applied to a human being and weight loss so I will leave it out).

Anyway, after a day back at work eating the leftover Xmas chocs and then a weekend clearing out the fridge of the festive leftovers (by ‘clearing out’, obviously I mean ‘eating’), I was set to start the WW plan on Monday 5th January. You may consider this a few days late to count strictly as New Year, but the way I see it, in the grand scheme of things (i.e the whole 365 days of 2015), that hardly seems important (although that may well be where I am going wrong!).

So will I manage this year to complete the rebound resolution or will I find it emerging sheepishly into the pack at the start of 2016?

Well I’m no great predictor of the future, but for the time being things are going well. If I can crack on with resolutions 2 (keep up fencing) and 3 (play more squash) then that can only help matters.
Whatever the outcome, I have a sneaking suspicion that it is unlikely to have earth-shattering consequences. I am pragmatic enough to recognise that my life will not be dramatically different if I weigh a bit less. Maybe this is the real reason this resolution is always there but never completed?

But for this year, the resolution has been set and I mean to do my damnedest to keep it this time round. Maybe then I can work on the other perennial resolution ‘be nicer to husband and children’….anyone like to take bets on the chances of success with that one?  Nah, me neither!


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